LIFE
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Hey :) Some inspo lately, some work. I’m so happy January is over hellloooo February. If I had to pick a month I hate the most, it’s Jan. It’s a month of cleaning up all the bullshit left over from 2022. Heading back to LA and looking forward to starting a fresh month in a fresh new space in a fresh new area. New beginnings and so much is coming. Happy Sunday x C
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Hi. I’m sitting at a bar with a glass of red wine waiting for my flight to board at 10:20 pm. There’s been a lot going on lately, feels nice to sit here and talk to you. I remember the days when I used to wake up at 6:00 am to blog before heading to work. Coffee in my bed, me and my computer in my little apartment in Greenwich Village. It was my time to dream about what I am doing now. That was about 12-13 years ago now. Wildddd. I built this website from that bed, launched collections. Everything and anything felt possible, but my reality was so different from the dreams in my head. The gap has closed, but now I just have new dreams and higher expectations for myself.
I’ve been thinking a lot about Self Worth lately. What that truly means to me and how I apply it to my everyday life. I used to think my definition of that was mine and true to me until life started to put me in situations where my “self worth” was tested. We use the word boundaries lately like it is trending. Set your boundaries Candice, know your worth, you don’t see you like I see you. But what does that even mean? Are “boundaries” and “self worth” just big words that we find on our Pinterest boards in quotes that tell us how we should and should not be. What we should tolerate and not tolerate. Like, who made up these rules! Why are we not thinking for ourselves?
Something happened to me last week that completely changed the way I see and perceive myself. I feel like I need to share it because maybe it will save you from the overthinking I went through to get here. I was walking with a coffee looking up at the Los Angeles blue sky and palm trees when I realized all of my decisions some good some bad have lead me here. All of those decisions I made myself. If I can get myself to this place, I can do anything. In that moment I fully understood what trusting myself really felt like. It doesn’t matter what anyone tells you, if you trust yourself you are unstoppable. If you fully trust yourself you know your self worth. The power will always remain with you, even if you make mistakes. Because those mistakes could have been made in your moments of let me just try this and see what happens. And if the result was not what you thought or expected - as long as you find your centre again and do different the next time, well I just think that’s the most badass way to live your life. What if these “boundaries” and “self worth” definitions are actually stopping us from taking those chances. That’s not growth, that’s fear disguised as following a made up value. Trust. Trusting that you will show up for yourself and trusting that you will make the right decisions for yourself will allow you to fully see yourself so you don’t put that on anyone else to fully see you. You’ll be too real and honest that you will only radiate honesty and realness in return. Your entire external life will shift. Anyways, just my thoughts. K boarding time, xx C
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New Years Eve in the jungle wearing a little yellow dress. Happy New Year!
// MIAMI, ART BASEL, VEGAS, WORK,,,,,
Miami, Art Basel, some lost film from Vegas with the fam, some work.
I was looking back at some photos of this time last year and I look like a completely different human. And I am really proud of that. I wanted to step into all of my fears - in love, in work, in finances, in location. And I did it. Fully, in all of its ups and downs. My dad passed away when I was 9 years old, and I wonder - I mean I know - his passing taught me how short life can be. He was 41. Maybe in some weird way I feel divinely protected by him, like the doors that are opening have his hands on them somehow. And maybe that’s why I jump in head first. But life, wow, what a beautiful, scary, very real place. Even in all of my ups and downs of this year I would do it all over again. I’m sitting in my studio on this cold Saturday morning listening to SZA’s new album, feeling just happy. There is so much work to get done before the holidays and I’m feeling so thankful for that. For the work that I get to create, in this little studio of mine. My own world that I’ve managed to carve out for myself. My place of refuge when life brought me to my knees, my place of daydreaming, magic and make-believe. My constant.
I learned how to show up for myself, I learned boundaries - still learning - I learned personal discipline, I learned how to make my company work for me - rather than me work for my company. Huge shifts in perspectives this year that felt so simple when I had them, but had such a profound effect on my life. Slowly I became my own constant I could trust and lean on. I’m learning how to truly grasp the moment of Now. How to truly understand how much power the present moment has. To take deep breaths when I get in my head and get into the flow of life, to allow what is to leave to leave, and what is to stay stay. To allow people to show up and be who they are as they are, to accept situations for what they are, and to know that in the end I have myself and she’s someone pretty special.
“Everyone buys books, few ever read them. Everyone wants growth, few accept the pain. Everyone wants to be happier, few ever change. Intention is nothin without action, but action is nothing without intention.”
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Rest, work, play repeat. Some images of life over the last couple months. I can’t believe it’s December next week. What an insane year. This year brought me back to myself. To the girl I was in my early twenties, when everything felt possible and magic was real. I explored different cities, said yes to everything that felt right. I had this unwavering faith that everything always worked out. Somewhere down the line of working so hard I lost some of that faith, got in my head too often and started to overthink. All of those sleepless nights could have been spent dreaming, or simply resting. Your thoughts are mighty powerful. Your soul knows the answer, let that guide your decisions. If it’s not an resounding yes, don’t do it. Distractions will come into your life, learn how to block out the noise. Most importantly I’ve learned that we are in charge of our own lives. If you want to be seen, see yourself, if you’re looking for someone to make you a home, make your own home, you want honestly and love and commitment? Love yourself fiercely, be open and honest with all of the multi layers of your being and commit to yourself. Show up for yourself in some form every single day. Be your own keeper. This is where the true confidence comes from.
I laid the foundation this year towards the life I would like to see for myself in the near feature. I made some hard decisions, leaned into anything & everything that felt absolutely terrifying and got over a lot of my own bullshit. I highly recommend sitting with the uglier sides of yourself, just make sure you surround yourself around the right people. The moment I was ready to sit with the many different sides of me, a whole new crew of people entered my life. People I now call family. The universe works like this. It has been a blessing to experience the magic of it this year.
Chat soon, back to work x
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Our embroidered linen. Inpspired by the Paris and the sexy vibes of South of France.
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how do i even put the last month into words. i can’t. it’s just been amazing. i feel different. i am different. small shifts in perspective that have changed the way i look at my present and future. how i understand my past. Anyways, it’s all been really exciting, grounding and peaceful. Here are photos of life and some work lately. Dana, Rachel and i just installed our newest bespoke rug project. Came out BEAUTIFUL. we did gradient ground with a gradient pattern overlayed on top. really loving LA, and excited to see where this place takes me!
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CKD’s newest collection is here! Inspired by a trip to La Paz, Mexico we lived on a ranch for a week, rode horses, the abuela’s made us home cooked meals. It really was an incredible experience. See the full collection here!
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Los Angeles has.been.fun. Way too many serendipitous moments happening lately! Here are some photos of life lately. Just wanted to say hi! x C
